


Closure

by shadowsong26



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-01
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-02-15 15:50:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2234652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowsong26/pseuds/shadowsong26
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the ride back to camp after her vengeance quest, Katara asks Zuko the Important Question. Originally posted to FFN 7/29/09</p>
            </blockquote>





	Closure

Katara huddled in the back of the saddle, as far away from Zuko as possible, staring down at the slowly-lightening ocean below them. This little misadventure had pushed her farther than she thought she could go, and not as far as she'd wanted to.  _What kind of person does that make me? And what does that make_ him _, that he helped me?_

She turned to study the older boy. He hadn't said anything since they'd left the ex-commander of the Southern Raiders behind. It was impossible to tell whether or not he'd approved of her decision.

_Not that I_ need  _his approval,_  she snapped at herself, bristling inwardly.

_He hasn't asked_ you _for help avenging_ his  _mother_.  
  
 _I didn't_ ask _for his. And who says he_ wants  _vengeance? He won't even say what happened!_  
  
Don't even--  
  
"What happened to your mother?" she asked, before she could stop herself.

He stiffened a little, and didn't answer for a long moment. "I don't know," he finally said.

"You don't know?" That didn't make any sense. His mother had been the Firelord's wife. She couldn't've just disappeared. it didn't work like that.

"No. I don't."

A few more minutes of uncomfortable silence passed. You shouldn't've brought it up.

_I told him_ my _story!  
  
So?_  
  
"How can you not  _know_?" she asked.

"I just  _don't_." His tone warned her to just drop it, but her common sense had apparenly been eaten up by the storm of emotions she'd fought through the last couple days and the resultant lack of sleep.

"You told me she was dead!"  
  
"I thought she was!"

"What changed your mind?" she asked, sarcastically.

He turned around. "You really want to know?" he snapped, glaring at her.

"Yeah. Yeah, I really do."

"After my cousin died, my father decided to ask my grandfather to disinherit my uncle. He didn't take this too well, and told my dad to have me killed. My mom found out about it. She woke me up, told me she loved me and that everything she'd done had been to protect me. I went back to sleep, and when I woke up the next morning, my grandfather was dead and she was gone. On the eclipse, I found out she left the Firenation alive. That's all I know. Happy?" he spat, then spun around again to glare at the horizon.

Stunned, Katara could only stare at his back, mouth open, trying to process all of this.

Zuko eased Appa into a turn, to avoid being spotted by a ship on the horizon. "I almost went looking for her," he said, quietly. "Instead of coming to join you."

"Why didn't you?" she asked, just as quietly.

"This was more important."

Another uncomfortable silence stretched between them. Some time later, she tentatively suggested, "Maybe you can go look for her when this is all over."

"Not gonna happen."

That was all she needed to make her bristle again.  _Don't you_ want  _to find out_? "Why not?"

"Even assuming I  _survive_ \--which is a damn big assumption--I'm not going to be  _able_ to," he replied, more than a little bitterly.

"Why not?" she repeated, folding her arms and glaring at him.

He turned enough to give her a withering look. "I'm conspiring with foreign powers to overthrow the lawful monarch of my nation," he said sharply. "You think that doesn't carry  _penalties_?"

That brought Katara up short. Maybe deliberately, she'd never really thought about consequences Zuko's choices could carry for him, even if they won. And if they  _lost_... "What will happen to you?" she asked, quietly.

"If I'm lucky? I'll probably be sent to Wu Xing. Inconvenient people are disappeared there."

"Political prisoners, you mean."

"Yeah." He paused. "More likely, I'll be put in a regular prison, like the Boiling Rock. If that happens, I'll probably be quietly assassinated within a year or so."

" _Why_?" she asked, horrified. "If what you're doing is worth  _killing_ you over--"

"Legally, it isn't," he cut her off. "Even this level of treason isn't a capital offence in the Firenation. Execution's resurved for really gruesome crimes."

"I don't think I want to know," she cut him off, hastily. "But if they can't execute you, then why...?"

"Because I'm a prince. If I'm left alive, I could really easily become a standard for a revolution. The last thing  _anyone_ wants is a civil war."

That made sense. Katara couldn't help remembering the factory town she and the others had visited earlier that summer, and shuddered. A civil war would mean almost every town in the nation would be like that. Whatever the Firenation's crimes, no one deserved that.

"And if I don't go to prison," Zuko went on, quietly, "I'll end up inheriting. Traitor or not, I  _am_ first in line. And if  _that_ happens, there's no  _way_ I can go off on some fool's errand looking for my mother."

"It wouldn't be a fool's errand!"  
  
"Yeah, it would," he replied, bleakly. "I don't even know where to start looking. And a lot can happen in seven years. Just 'cause she left home alive doesn't mean she still is now."

"Doesn't mean you shouldn't  _try_ ," she said.

"Doesn't it?" he ased, not looking at her. "Even if I  _could_ find her, what's to say I wouldn't wish I hadn't? If she's...dead, it'll be losing her all over again. And if she's alive..." He trailed off, hands tightening on the reins. "Even if she couldn't contact me at home, she had  _three years_ while I was in exile. And she didn't. And she  _left me_ to..." He trailed off again. "Nevermind. If I don't know what happened to her, I can still imagine that it's the best possible answer. Whatever that is."

Katara searched for the right words to answer his bitterness, and found nothing. She hugged her knees to her chest and resumed staring down at the ocean.

The last hour of their flight back to camp passed in weary silence.


End file.
